Usually, advice columnist Carolyn Hax is the very soul of good sense. She rarely misinforms, misleads or misadvises a letter writer. This, however, is an exception (Seattle Times, 11/7/18). Hax’s inquirer signs herself “Wannabe Mom, Not Wannabe Wife,” a label that, strangely enough, is only tangentially related to her, her situation and her question.
WMNWW’s question – whether she should, without a partner, adopt a child – could be right out of the 1990s. That was a time when the “Single Mothers by Choice” movement was in flower. The women of that movement were intentionally giving birth to or adopting children without the involvement of a man. It was all portrayed as terribly “courageous” on their part and few people raised their voices to challenge them. One of course was Vice President Dan Quayle who famously questioned whether TV character Murphy Brown (Candace Bergen) should have been depicted as having a child without a father. Quayle pointed out that doing so shouldn’t be considered “just another lifestyle choice.”